Although this site is primarily devoted to promoting the majestic moose, I thought that I should also take the opportunity to spread the word about the exciting and relatively new sport of Stannah Stairlift Racing. As yet, it is not a widely practised sporting discipline, however, it's very big in the Netherlands, and has a small but very active - and growing - following in the United Kingdom and Denmark. This is in great part thanks to the relentless patronage and work of HRH Prince Olaf of Denmark. Prince Olaf was exiled from his native country, as the Danish Royal Family considered that his passion for Stannah Stairlift racing, gibbers and hard-core porn was damaging their image. The Prince has been the President of the International Stannah Stairlift Racing Federation (ISSRF)since 1982, and has no intention of standing down for a good few years yet.
Hi dere, you cragy Internet peoplej! Here ij de official webshite of de International Shtannah Shtairlift Rashing Federashion. Aj you are maybe already knowing, I am a prinsh in my country, which ij Denmark. But I am now living here in de Nederlands becaush I get in a liddle trouble wij de King. Familiej, ish de shame in de whole world, yesh? But now you are lucky, becaush dis cragy guy hash made a webshite about what I ish loving mosht in de world apart from hard-core porn and gibbersh. It ish about Shtannah Shtairlift Rashing! He ish a really cragy guy! But ish good, becaush now I can look at hard-core porn and Shtairlift Rashing at de shame time! It ish really cragy!
But sherioushly, Shtannah Shtairlift Rashing ish a shport for all agesh and we will show you dat even de old peoplesh can do it! And de handicapped modderfuckersh too! Ish for Prinshesh and really poor shmelly trampsh too, yes? Sho I shay, you cragy Web-shurfing peoplesh, you all shtop looking at hard-core porn and eating gibbersh, and shit on yout Shtannah Shtairliftsh and go cragy! Yesh!
You don't have to have devoted your life to the ISSRF like Prince Olaf to be able to recognise a Stannah Stairlift. For over 30 years, Stannah has produced what are simply the finest examples of a machine designed for speed at a 40 degree angle in the history of mankind. A Stannah Stairlift is instantly distinguishable from inferior stairlifts by its sleek styling, and aggressive look. And no other stairlift can get anywhere near to Stannah performance. This is why only Stannah Stairlifts are used in competitive racing. The aim of this section is to provide an overview of currently available standard models, to help those who would like to join the Stannah Stairlift Racing fraternity. Please bear in mind that this is not intended to be a complete guide to all existing racing stairlifts. In addition, if you decide to pursue this exciting sport, expect to invest a lot of money and time in customising your Stannah Stairlift for optional performance in high-level competition. Examples of customised vehicles will be added later to give you an idea of the required standards.
The Ambassador GTX MkIV is the perfect beginner's racing stairlift. It's legendary reliability derives from the experience gained from years of manufacturing the flagship Ambassador range. The Ambassador MkI was released to general acclaim in 1959, and the range has gone from strength to strength since then. It is powered by a no-nonsense 34 kW electric engine, and the basic model will reach 2 mph in under 15 seconds. "Souped up" versions will do 0-2 in 9 seconds. The Ambassador boasts a lightweight stainless steel frame and differential gears which allow it to take tight corners much faster - and more safely - than traditional heat-tempered steel framed versions. HRH Prince Olaf himself started out using an Ambassador GTX MkIII, and continued to customise it and race it for many years, before finally upgrading to a Typhoon Supercharged. An ideal choice for newcomers which will perform well for many years to come.
I.S.S.R.F. Class 1.a
A prototype of the Thunderpussy Vactra was revealed to the public at the 1977 Earl's Court Motor Show. However, it remained a concept stairlift until February 1982. Since then, it has proved a popular choice for both amateur and professional Stannah Stairlift racing drivers. Indeed, it was with a Thuderpussy Vactra that Alex Sanderson Jr. 3rd won the 1985 Daytona Open. Since then, the Thunderpussy Vactra has been mostly retired from professional races, having been superseeded by more high-tech models such as the Typhoon and the Firebeaver Mach 2. However, the Thunderpussy continues to dominate the amateur circuit, and as such is a splendid option for serious amateurs.
I.S.S.R.F. Class 1.b