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Every Sperm Is Sacred

lyrics by Michael Palin and Terry Jones

transcribed by Rebecca Burgess on or before 25/03/87

There are Jews in the world, there are Buddhists,
There are Hindus and Mormons and then
There are those that follow Mohammed,
but I've never been one of them.

I'm a Roman Catholic,
And have been since before I was born,
And the one thing they say about Catholics is
They'll take you as soon as you're warm.

You don't have to be a six footer,
You don't have to have a great brain,
You don't have to have any clothes on,
You're a Catholic the moment Dad came, because

Every sperm is sacred, Every sperm is great,
If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate.

Every sperm is sacred, Every sperm is great,
If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate.

Let the heathen spill theirs, On the dusty ground,
God shall make them pay for Each sperm that can't be found.

Every sperm is wanted, Every sperm is good,
Every sperm is needed, In your neighborhood.

Hindu, Taoist, Mormon, Spill theirs just anywhere,
But God loves those who treat their Semen with more care.

Every sperm is sacred, Every sperm is great,
If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate.

Every sperm is sacred, Every sperm is good,
Every sperm is needed, In your neighborhood.

Every sperm is useful, Every sperm is fine,
God needs everybody's, Mine, and mine, and mine.

Let the pagans spill theirs, O'er mountain, hill and plain.
God shall strike them down for Each sperm that's spilt in vain.

Every sperm is sacred, Every sperm is good,
Every sperm is needed, In your neighborhood.

Every sperm is sacred, Every sperm is great,
If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate. .

 

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