Double Take - My Working Week

My Working Week

By Vaughan Savidge

Marketing Manager:

Here you are, sir. I've written your contribution for this week's Sunday business paper - you know - the My Working Week column.

Company Chairman:

Oh yes. Let me read it before it goes out. (He becomes more incredulous as he reads the column)

My Working Week.

Monday: Get up at three a.m. to answer faxes from head office, Widget Ltd., New York. By four a.m., am in the office organising day's schedule. Fly to Beijing, Paris and Guatemala for seven separate business meetings. Don't waste time on the plane - write a book on management practices. Good. Good. I like that.

Tuesday: Get up at midnight to receive proof copies of the now international best-seller I wrote on the plane yesterday. Go back to bed for 23 seconds, before going into the office to outline the complete redesign of our manufacturing line. Fire twenty seven junior managers. (Sounds slightly disbelieving).

Wednesday: A lie in today. Up at two a.m. to send faxes to New York. (Note to board - is the plural of fax "faxes" or "faeces". Sometimes wonder). Into the office at five a.m. to find another secretary dead on the job. Fly to seven European countries to market our new Widgets.

Thursday: Organise a US$600 billion world-wide Widget advertising campaign while brushing my teeth at 3:30 a.m. before my weekly run into work via Sai Kung, Kwun Tong, Tsuen Wan and Pokfulam. Arrive at the office at 3:34 a.m. Fire our South American reps, my amah and wife.

Friday : ...

Look, are you sure they'll buy this? It seems a little far fetched to me.

Marketing Manager:

Well they've allowed every other self-publicising lunatic to claim he works himself to death six or seven times a week.

Company Chairman:

No no no. Not the overall. This bit about running to Tsuen Wan. Nobody in their right mind would be caught dead there.