Double Take - Two Plus Two

Two Plus Two

By Vaughan Savidge

Master: All right children. Settle down. I know mathematics is not the most popular of subjects, but in later life you may have cause to thank me. Now, where did we get up to. Ah yes - addition. All right, McLeod, what's two plus two?

(an unsure sort of toddler's gurgling voice - a long complicated process with lots of thought before arriving at the answer)

Master: How can it be 4 million?

(toddler's gurgling voice)

Master: You find it easier in millions? I see. Purves, leave Murray's satchel alone. You may think you know it all now, but one day you'll look up and find yourself as a clerk at the Midland, and then where will you be? Pay attention. All right, how about one of the young ladies? Miss Lam. You've been very quite. Here's a little problem for you. If I give you, say 30 pounds - all right McLeod - 30 million pounds, and you invest it for a year at - all right Purves - three per cent interest, but that seems very low - how much would you be left with?

(toddler's gurgling voice)

Master: 29 million?

(toddler's gurgling voice)

Master: What do you mean you lost some on foreign exchange dealings? If that's your attitude young lady then I think you'd better forget about a career in business. I think you may be more suited to a job where you can't get your hands on too much money - you'd better start thinking of a life in public service.